I Am Love Healing Center

two person's connecting fingersTouch Starvation


Touch starvation is also called touch deprivation and skin hunger. 

Humans need touch to survive.
We need 4 hugs a day to live, 8 to be happy and 12 to grow and thrive.  How many of us are getting enough?
Our skin is our biggest organ composed of 1.6 trillion cells, and on just one square inch of skin, we have THOUSANDS of nerve receptors that constantly transmit information to our nervous system about our external environment, pressure, touch, pain, and temperature.  Our nervous system uses this information (+our other senses) to control virtually every function in our body.
The amount and quality of touch we receive have a HUGE impact on our nervous system and therefore our overall health.

The number of people who live alone, work from home, and are not in relationships has greatly increased and has left them feeling isolated and without any human contact, or very little contact.

Something that no one talks about is that unfortunately, many people who are in relationships can also be touch-starved.  Sexual intimacy does not equal safe and loving touch -which our body needs to be healthy and happy.  Each individual also has their own preference for how much touch they need to be happy, and can sometimes find themselves with a partner whose need for touch is significantly different.  Sometimes conflicts in relationships lead to disconnection and the withdrawal of touch and intimacy -in all forms completely.  

From what I see every single day, men are struggling with this much more than women.  Men have the added pressure from society to be tough and not complain to not appear weak or needy.  If they are too affectionate with women -they are called creepy and if they are too affectionate with men -they are homosexuals. 

Some men do not feel safe at all to express their need for touch, love, for affection and it makes them feel so alone.   Because of this, they have a hard time asking for help and have a hard time talking about their struggles or their mental health.  


What does touch starvation feel like?

Symptoms of touch starvation are aggressive behavior, high-stress levels, anxiety, depression, low satisfaction, difficulty sleeping, fatigue, body image issues, loneliness, sexual dysfunction, fear of attachment, and more.
Here is more bad news,  Cortisol is a hormone that is released when we are under stress, and it is also increased in a person who is touch-starved.
Some of the very well-known effects of long-term cortisol overexposure are Anxiety, Depression, Digestive problems, Headaches, Muscle tension and pain, Heart Disease, Stroke, Heart attack, High blood pressure, Sleep problems, and weight gain, and increased risk for addictive behavior.
It is so clear that TOUCH is of vital importance to our physical, emotional, and mental well-being. …and I think our life depends on it.
I am committed to educating people about this topic and helping those who are touch-starved feel less alone. I want to empower them towards recovery and reestablishing healthy touch and emotional connections in their life.
I have two in-person treatments for touch starvation:
1. Touch starvation massage
I have created a special massage for touch starvation that is slow, gentle,  nurturing, and comforting and with a dash of energy healing.  The energy healing just adds a feeling of safety and unconditional love and makes you more relaxed and able to enjoy this experience to the fullest.
The massage explores 3 different types of touch/pressure and releases a lot of oxytocin which lowers blood pressure, and heart rate and calms down your nervous system.  It gets you out of your head and connects you deeply to your body.
2. Cuddle therapy
Either on its own, or after the touch starvation massage. I gently hold you in a number of cuddling positions that you enjoy.  We are fully clothed and can cuddle on the couch or lay down on a comfortable mattress.  Add some candles and music and let your stresses melt away.
It has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my life to be able to do that and make my clients feel cared for,  loved and safe.
There is a special consent form and code of conduct that we discuss and sign before the session.